employment letter...Saturday, September 29, 2007
Dear Roman Abramovich,
I understand that you are fervently searching for a manager that can manage a world-class team of huge egos, play unprecedented football and capture elusive European glory. While you have yet to decide on the most suitable candidate, allow me to introduce myself.
I am affectionately known as astuka aka "the SPARE-cial one", by my players and have previously on 2 occasions captured Europe's holy grail. Please don't take offence, but I was previously the manager of Arsenal, your fierce London rival. Under my astute leadership and great vision, I carved out the reputation of Arsenal while working on a shoe-string budget. Arsenal is now 5 time consecutive champion in Football Manager 2007 with the fans and the board worshipping me as their new football god. With your financal backing, its not hard to imagine Chelsea as the most dominant football force on the planet.
I am also a manager that favours playing an attacking style. Parking buses in front of goals or requesting wide men to track back would disappear immediately if I am to be employed as the manager of Chelsea FC. Instead, I would drill into the players an attack-oriented gampe plan, with the motto of "strike fast, strike deep and strike hard." while chelsea have the substance, you will need my style to achieve your dream of flowing, beautiful soccer.
Please consider my application letter carefully because it might affect the future of Chelsea Fc. Discarding this letter would mean the end of Chelsea, and possibly slipping into the Championship. Accepting me could mean endless trophies and possibilities. Making a choice has never been so easy. Call at 1800-VERY GOOD.
yours sincerely,
The Spare-cial One.
